Sima Taparia

This has a lot of importance in Indian Culture. Marriage is a religious culture from vedic times. Water and fire are two proofs that are present. In Indian culture relationship of a married couple is forever. There is an English saying that Marriages are made in Heaven but accomplished only on earth.

Sagai(Engagement)

This is a relation between a boy and a girl which is known as an engagement, which is performed in the presence of the people of the society and as a proof the friends and the relatives in the society are kept. Here the relatives of the girl go to the boy’s house, here the tilak on the forehead of the boy is put and he is garlanded also. Fruits, dry fruits, coconuts, clothes, jewellery are given for the boy’s parents and siblings, relatives are also given money according to the status. The girl is made to sit on the left side of the boy nowadays, but according to old rites during the Saat phera or before that the girl is always sitting on the right side of the boy.

Tyohar(Festival or Function)

It is before the marriage ritual. Some festivals like Diwali, Sankranti, Kajli Tij, Ganesh Chaturthi, Holi are the main ones. The girls parents send mangoes, sweets, charoli to boy’s house which are distributed to the relatives. During Diwali crackers and sweet meats and during Sankranti sweet meats made of til and clothes for the boy, Baes, Juari, Satudi are sent. During Ganesh Chaturthi sweet meats, silver bars, clothes and sweet meats is also sent on Holi. From the boys house on Teej day Sinjara(Saree and sweet meats) are sent to the girl. Sweetmeats on Sankrantiday and on Diwali.

Vivah(Marriage)

First Ganesh Pujan is performed atleast before 5 to 21 days according to the facilities.

The person who is made the Vinayak(main person) goes to the Ganesh temple with all the puja materials and the wedding card. This day songs are sung four women folk take mung dal in their hands sweet lapsi and rice are prepared for food and even chatarphali Raita is made. All the people of the house eat the food. On this day they make pakoras of mung dal. The bride and the bridegroom are given 5 pakoras and four married ladies crush the pakoras, from this a little dal ka pakoras are made which are given to the girls and the daughters of the family to eat. A puja is performed brfore grinding the pakoras. Coal, nail, supari, 1 1/2 rupees, a small religious thread on which kumkum is applied and the puja is performed. After Ganesh puja we should do a Nandi Shraadh so that no mishaps take place.

Maata Pujan

Before the marriage according a puja is performed of Devi Sitala. On this day the parents, the bride, the bridegroom all eat cold food (nothing is heated).

Battisi Nautna

This is performed in the girl’s parent’s house, if the house is very far off then this rite is performed before ‘Mayra’. For this we need Betel leaf, Supari, Badam, Lavang, Elaichi, Kharek, Cashewnut 5 dry fruits, jaggery, 32 laddoos, 32 rupees, if the marriage is in out station then 5 kg rice, red cloth is taken, and all this is put in the lap of the elder brother of the mother. Tilak is put on the forehead of other brother and a coconut is given (sriphal) songs are sung clothes (saree blouse) and money are given to the bridegroom at the time of the bride going away to her inlaw’s house.

Ganpati Pujan

Place the statue of the ganpati on the place of the marriage. Here also 16 Matru or Navagraha puja is performed by parents, clothes and topi are given to the elder person in the family and laddoo and money are also given.

Tani Bandhana

Religious strings are tied at the marriage dias. Rakhi is tied on the top on a shade and a saree is kept.

Dhan Hath

This ritual is done by the ladies about 4 to 8 in number under the shade. In this necessary materials like rice, mung, turmeric powder, silver ghughra, money, 7 fruits, 2 soop ; and 2 Belan are put in the plate for the puja.

Kankan Dora

In this ritual, an iron key bunch, Laakh fruits kodi, silver ghughra are taken all this is tied in a string and tied on the wrist of the bride and bridegroom, other family members also tie this, this tying denotes that the bride and groom are going to start their new married life. They should lead their married life as strong as iron and gain success in life. Society should give you respect.

Panchan Pujan(Vinayak Sits)

After doing Ganpati Stapana grains, haldi, mung dal, whole dhaniya are put

Mayra

In this ritual the sisters serve sherbet to all their brothers and their wives. Then men are given sriphal (coconut) and tilak is put on the forehead. A saree and a blouse is given to brother’s wife.

Kaalash Bandhna

Here the brothers take a pot of money from their sisters and sarees and clothes are given to the sister and the son-in-law and his family. Then there is ‘Mayra’ clothes, jewellery are taken for the bride and the groom and for the other family members. Clothes are also given to Brahmins and songs are also sung.

Var Nikasi

First the groom is made to have bath and made to wear the clothes which have been given to him by his maternal uncle which he wears throughout the marriage ceremony, then after performing the Sharada Pujan he is brought out by his maternal uncle to mount on the female horse. Now a small heap of mud is stamped on under which there is Raii and Money, by doing this it is said that the groom is going to get married and return back with the bride which shows his masculinity. As he mounts the horse his mother performs puja of the horse, mehndi is applied and money is given to the person incharge of the horse. Then tilak is put on the forehead of the groom. Kajal and glass is shown to him. The groom’s mother blesses him to come home with his bride and not alone. Now all the other son-in-laws of the family hold the reins of the horses and are given money to leave the reins. In the ‘chal’ ceremony married women come forward with pots in which the bridegroom keeps money. The youngest daughter of the family sits at the back of the groom on the horse, this daughter just sprinkles rye and salt over the head of the groom. This is done as there is a belief that the groom will not fall prey of bad omen. The groom carries a ‘khatar’, ‘Gatjoda’, a fruit and a coconut is tied around his waist and with this he is taken to the temple. From here the procession ‘Barat’ starts to reach the bride’s house. Chappal, Betel Leaf, Patasha are sent to the bride’s house, This shows that the bride’s house is under the care of groom’s house people ; this proves that the the bride’s people will look after all the needs of the groom’s people from head to feet.

Kanya Vrat(Kanyawal)

This is done by the elders, parents and maternal uncle and aunt of the bride. They swear that they will eat only after the marriage solemnized of the bride(daughter). Here they take supari and give to the bride. In the groom’s house the groom is made to hold a pot and drink ‘ghimri’ and he is made to go round and round a ‘Dhidholi’ 2-4 times.

Var Varan

Also called ‘Praybarna’ or ‘Gotrachar’. The parents and other close members in the bride’s family take fruits, puja thali, raw milk (not made hot), clothes, jewellery. They first wash the feet of the groom, put tilak and these materials are given to him. Then the Brahmins chant the ‘Gotras’ and ‘Kul’ of both the families. In this the bridegroom and the bride should not be of the same ‘Kul’ or ‘Gotra’.

Bari

In this the groom gives silver thread, 4 silver small boxes, ‘Chink’, ‘Kumkum’, ‘Tika’ to the bride. Small bundles of strings, dry fruits are taken by atleast 5 persons (father-in-law and son-in-law) to the bride’s house. The bride wears these ornaments and comes to in-law’s house. Then the God-Bharai of the bride is performed. Money is given to the groom’s family while on the entrance the groom touches the ‘Toran’ with a neem stick and he is told to dismount from the horse. The bride has a bath and wears the clothes given to her by her maternal uncle before the baraat comes to her house. Before the ‘Saat Phere’, a ‘Gangaur’ Puja is performed. At the marriage dias 3 pheras are taken by the bride around the groom. The mother of the bride with her bhabhi do the puja of the bride and the groom. The maternal uncle and aunt of the bride wash feet of the groom.

Varmala

The groom and the bride exchange garlands at the entrance of the door.

Havan Rungpaan

Colours are crushed by the daughters, sisters and their husbands with mehndi powder and katha. Then ‘Havan’ is done by the parents of the bride. 4 pheras are taken around this havan. The last phera is taken with the groom ahead and the bride behind him. While performing the pheras the bride has to touch a small stone with her feet which means that she is entering a family life (be a house wife) or she is a spinster before the pheras.
The couple perform the havan of ‘Laja’(Saal ki Dhaani). This is done by the brother of the bride. After this the bride leaves the marriage dias escorted by the maternal uncle. The girl is also given a silver ornament and then the parents perform the ‘kanyadaan’ (as if giving away the daughter to the groom).

Bidaai

In this ritual the father-in-law is made to sit under the shade of the dias and Haldi Kumkum is put over him and given money.
The branch shade is taken off by the son-in-law. Then the newly married couple are sent away. The bride performs the puja at the entrance, She has to keep with her laddoos in a vessel and red cloth. These laddoos are given to the mother-in-law of the bride. On reaching the groom’s house, bride’s ‘aarti’ is performed and welcomed. She has to plant her footsteps first on the kumkum and and walk on a white long cloth. On the way 7 ‘thalis’ are also put and in each thali one supari, ‘khaja’, ‘kharek’ are put. A nose ring is tied at the end of the saree palavi of the bride so that while walking the nose ring just touches the ground.